Thursday, March 24, 2011

How to use a Louvre


When I first saw the Grand Canyon I realised that here was something about as big as you could get and still retain some sense of scale. The Louvre is in this class. It is really, really big. You can’t see it all in one visit, unless it lasts for a year or so.

If you get there by opening time (9am today) you will get through the queue in about five minutes. Like the Musée d’Orsay and the Tour Eiffel, there is bag screening, but unlike those there are no soldiers with machine guns.

If you get there early you will also have a chance to get close to the Mona Lisa. After 10am she will be constantly surrounded by a hundred admirers, most of whom are either taking photos (‘Here’s me with the Mona Lisa, here’s my dog with the Mona Lisa’ etc) or shaking their heads and saying ‘Is that all?’ You can’t get close enough to examine the painting as a work of art – ten feet at most – so just acknowledge its presence on the wall and tick it off the list. There are other, much more interesting paintings in the room, so it won’t be a wasted visit.

There are many places to sit down. Use them. You will be glad you did.

If you can arrange it, try to see a group of about twenty eight-year-olds being marshalled for a toilet stop. Great comic relief.

Do your homework before you go. Work out what you want to see and stick to it. Otherwise you will become confused and listless. We decided on the Italian paintings, some of the French romantics, and a few major items. We covered them fairly superficially and then it was time for lunch.

Lunch! Mmmm. The Café de la Pyramid – great decor and great food. Or have chocolate and croissants while overlooking the gardens. Mmmm again.

Afterwards go for a walk in the Jardin des Tuileries and watch the people. Endlessly fascinating.

PS Make sure you see the Venus de Milo - she's far more attractive and doesn't have half as many hangers-on as Lisa.

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